Monday, November 30, 2009

Charge Bikes Poetry

From Beer Fridays, the day on which the nice people at Charge Bikes offer a goodie bag that includes beer for twitter messages including their name. (One name drawn at random, etc etc).

Nothing inspires a chap like the thought of free booze.

Riding Belgian Cobbles / Rattling out yer teeth / Would be far more comfortable / With a @CHARGEBIKES spoon beneath

I once met a girl / She said my riding style could be looser / "How so?" I asked / She said "By riding a @CHARGEBIKES juicer".

Boris Johnson saved a lady / By riding his bike at a thug / Would he have been more scary / Riding a @CHARGEBIKES Plug?

@CHARGEBIKES make nice stuff / In Somerset En-ger-land / They also feature in a film / What was done by Nick Hand.

@CHARGEBIKES comp today / features tasty Charge Ale / Tweeps who don't win / Will surely weep and wail

Although they're called @CHARGEBIKES / They also make other stuff / You can win some of it / Just tweet their name (once is enough)

People might think you're odd / If you say you ride on a spoon / But those who've heard of @CHARGEBIKES / will not think you're a loon.

Merry Christmas from @CHARGEBIKES / We thought we'd send you a knife / It's one of our saddles / No need to fear for your life.

If you look at @CHARGEBIKES / You might think they only do fixed / But have a look at the Juicer / Their range is really quite mixed

I'm writing @CHARGEBIKES Rhymes / Not for the prize (though it seems) / I'm fulfilling my life's ambition / To start a couple of memes.

If a young lady were to ride a bike / A cad might try to kiss her / But she could ride off at speed / If her bike was a @CHARGEBIKES scissor

The problem with my rhymes / Is sadly they're a little bit crap / But @CHARGEBIKES are great / Like the Plug, the Mixer and Tap.

Would my rhymes be better / If I drank a load of beer? / If I win this competition / @CHARGEBIKES will send some here.

If I ride my Brompton / I'd wear a bowler hat / But I wouldn't riding @CHARGEBIKES / Because I'd look a bit silly.

If you want @CHARGEBIKES schwag / You've only got ten minutes / If you tweet their name / There's a chance to win it

On a @CHARGEBIKES Duster / You'll ride around with ease / Could this be because / The frame is Tange Prestige? #INFORMATIONAL

On a @CHARGEBIKES Plug / You won't look like a wally / It is Navy Blue / And made out of Chromoly. #INFORMATIONAL

There's so many @CHARGEBIKES rhymes / I'd put them in a book / I doubt I'd sell very many / As no one would have a look. #SeeWhatIDidThere?

The @CHARGEBIKES rhymes I've done / now number nearly forty / I like tweeting them / But my followers think it's naughty

Some of my @CHARGEBIKES rhymes / Are sweary like gangsta rap / The fatman he likes those / And thinks the others are rubbish. #tribute

If you own a @CHARGEBIKES fixed / do you ride it in the cold? / I worry about my knees / Because I'm very old.

I had a @CHARGEBIKES Plug / It really was a looker / Someone scratched the paint / So I called him a clumsy person. #rhymebarrel

There is a @CHARGEBIKES chain / Half linked and called the Masher / It comes in different colours / To make your bike look flasher

@CHARGEBIKES handle bar tape / Recommend it to a friend / Walk into your LBS / And ask for some "U Bend" #FiftiesJingleWriter

@CHARGEBIKES saddles get great reviews / but the test they always pass / Comes once you pedal away on one / With an incredibly comfortable a

If you have @CHARGEBIKES in Canada / Remember that it's Beer Friday / Why not enter the comp? / And then go for a ride, eh? #FunWithAccents

@CHARGEBIKES are ideal / for riding in the city / As you filter though the jams / And make the drivers feel quite silly.

I like to ride @CHARGEBIKES / While eating a pack of Rolos / Perhaps on a classic climb / Like the Mortirolo. #clunkyrhymes

I first saw @CHARGEBIKES / When a Plug went whizzing past / I tried to catch him up / But he was too bloody fast. #100%ofFact

If you tweet @CHARGEBIKES / And write some stuff below 'em / You could win some stuff / As long as you also follow 'em #competitionrules

It seems my @CHARGEBIKES rhymes / make my followers want to run / I find this odd / As I'm having a lot of fun

I hear @CHARGEBIKES make clothes / Perhaps they make a hat / Then you could ride your bike / Without looking a bit silly.

One of @CHARGEBIKES cycles / Is called the Lazy Susan / The pedals on it aren't SPDs / So keep your normal shoes on. #that'sbetter

@CHARGEBIKES announce the winner / Very much later / Which makes Friday a trial / If you're a rhyme hater.

If I ever rode a fixie / I'd rock a @CHARGEBIKES plug racer / Its good looks stole my heart / Like the Surly Pacer

The @CHARGEBIKES Griffin / Isn't really my cup of tea / But you'll probably like it a lot / If you're considerably hipper than me

If you want leather bar tape / you could pay a fortune for Brooks / Or pay significantly less / for
@CHARGEBIKES with similar looks.

You might not get on with the saddle/ That's included in @CHARGEBIKES prizes/ But I believe you'll find the beer/ Suits Cyclists of all sizes

@CHARGEBIKES make a saddle / It is called the spoon / If you live in Newcastle / Why not ride it around the toon.

@CHARGEBIKES stuff / Sometimes has a funny name / But it is very good / And not at all lame.

As the prize includes drink / You should probably make time / To compose your @CHARGEBIKES tweets / In poorly done rhyme.

It's the end of the week / and Friday's here / Mention @CHARGEBIKES / And you could win some beer. (You need to follow them too).

No comments: